Why I Like Twitter

Twitter is fun and easy, bro. It’s far better than Facebook or MySpace because it’s super-interactive and you don’t have to listen to the details of anyone’s pathetic life story. Alls you do is this: Go on a few times a day and tweet about what’s going on the world, what you’re reading/listening to, super funny links or news stories, anything like that. It feels retarded at first because no one is paying attention to you, but if you post stuff you know Third World Timmy or I will re-tweet it, other people will see you are funny, and you will start to find friends to talk to.

I can tweet about stuff I like and other people across the world who like that stuff too will talk to me. Since nobody I’m “actual” friends with in the “real world” shares my tastes, that is AWESOME.

I can talk to bands, writers, and comedians I enjoy. For the last three years AV Club has been my fav website – I can now shoot questions/comments at any of the writers and they will respond. That is AWESOME. Paul F Tompkins, my 2nd fav comedian, has tweeted at me a few times. Ashton Kutcher tweeted at Third World Timmy, and gave him a lifetime boner. Third World Timmy’s boner is AWESOME.

I can drive traffic to my articles by linking to them throughout the day and getting a RT once in awhile. The difference between promoting and not promoting on Twitter is HUGE. Also AWESOME.

What you need to do, is get over the feeling of stupidity and weirdness that is normal for any new user of Twitter. It really feels like the stupidest thing you can do, but just realize, SO IS EVERYTHING ELSE. People make fun of Twitter because it’s relatively new, but those same people made fun of Facebook too. You need to find the people on Twitter that are cool and will talk to you, and then it feels like you’re part of a community. Don’t be self conscious about it, don’t think it’s automatically dumb just because it’s on THE INTERNET. It’s a great tool for word of mouth marketing and also just for chatting with people you don’t know. When I get lonely, I turn on Twitter; when I want people to read my stuff, I turn on Twitter. When I want to stalk famous dudes, I TURN ON TWITTER.

It’s amazing. Trust me. You’ll have fun once you get the hang of it. Put up a picture, tho – if you don’t have a pic, nobody’s gonna follow you ’cause they think you’re a spambot.

[This was originally an email sent to Mr. 51% when he professed a need for a "Twitter For Dummies."]

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About the Author

Oswald Hobbes is an award-winning journalist and internet celebrity. His best friends include Pete Wentz and Thomas Pynchon. He's intense, and a show pony. He's the music editor for Assault.it. Follow me on twitter
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